How to make 9.5 million dollars in one stroke

Woohoo!! My dream has finally come true! U know, the dream that I had since childhood, the dream that we all share. To inherit a huge amount of money by the way of an untimely (timely for us) demise of a rich, anonymous, generous relative.

Not in my wildest dream had I imagined that such a huge sum would come to me in this form. That too, from some other country altogether. That too, without any hassle involved, especially the tax part.

This moment is so special that I want to share it with you all. So here lies what made today an unforgettable one.

FROM MR ABDUL SAMAD. AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING UNIT. FOREIGN OPERATIONS DEPARTMENT. UNION TOGOLAISE DE BANQUE,(U.T.B) LOME- TOGO.

Togo? All that I knew about Togo till today was that it is a small footballing Nation in Africa. Arsenal's in form striker Manu Adebayor hails from Togo, and is apparently unsatisfied with their handling of the sports. That it qualified for the world cup last year but failed to do it for this year's ongoing African Cup of Nations. Hmm, interesting that I have acquaintances there.

Dear Abhishek,

I am Mr Abdul Samad,Auditing And Accounting Unit,Foreign Operation Department Union Togolaise De Banque Lome Togo. With due respect and regard.I have decided to contact you on a business transaction that will be very beneficial to both of us at the end of the transaction


Woah!!! Somebody pinch me. Not only does my benefactor from Togo know me, he is a big man there! Auditing and Accounting Unit? Foreign Operation Department Union Togolaise De Banque? And here I am, a measly commoner in this country of 1.13 billion, who has to waste 5 hours just to get someone from the Govt to attest his admit card of an entrance test, only to prove that it is indeed him in that photograph. Moreover, he has kept my interests (unknown to him till 2003) in his mind while taking such an important decision!! My days have surely changed!!

During our investigation and auditing in this bank, my department came across a very huge sum of money belonging to a deceased person Mr G.C Badran who died on the 26th of December 2003 with his wife and their only daughter.They travelled to IRAN on holiday and unfotunantely, they were involved in an Earthquake which occoured in Bam on the 26th of December 2003 in IRAN which claim about 25 thausand lives in the Earthquake . Since then I have made several enquiries to their embassy here to locate any of his extended family relatives, but all efforts proved abortive.

Mr. G.C. Badran... let me check my family tree... Oh heck, who cares, as long as he was rich and generous... R.I.P. Mr. Badran. May you get salvation. How ironic that you died on the day that a new India was born. Maybe this is a sign, an omen (remember the Alchemist?). That a person from India should get his hands on the riches. How lucky that it was me!! I am still blinking in disbelief!!

After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to track his last name over the business directory in our chamber of commerce, trade and tourism, to locate any member of his family hence my contacting you. I contact you to assist in repatriating the fund valued at US$9.5 million left behind before it gets confiscated or declared unclaimed by our Bank where this huge amount was deposited.

I can understand how frustrating it must have been Mr. Samad. Searching for his relative among the hundreds of billions of Togolese. Perhaps that explains why you shifted your gaze to this country of a few dozens, and picked me!! I am so thankful to you. I am so thankful to the universe! For conspiring for my desire!!
I am still in a shock. Can you imagine? US $ 9.5 million?
Yes you are right Mr. Samad. I should hurry up and get that money and convert it into my country's currency as soon as possible. Or else the rupee might rise and make those dollars a little less. I wish that you had been a little early in sending that mail. Just a few months ago I would have converted that amount at 48 rs per dollar instead of 32....never mind....I will make do with those 9.5 million.

Our Bank has issued a notice to provide his next of kin and Since I have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for over one year , I seek the consent to present you as the next of kin to the deceased deposited sum in our Bank so that the proceeds of this account can be paid to you.

Err, you were searching his relatives only for an year? But that means that the bank must have made a huge amount of money by investing his 9.5 million dollars (that rightfully belong to me) for 4 years before you started your search. Never mind Mr. Samad, I am ready to forgive and forget, just get to the part where I get this money. The suspense is too much for me to handle.

Therefore, on receipt of your positive response, we shall then discuss the sharing ratio and modalities for the transfer. I have all necessary information and legal documents needed to back you up for the claim which i payed greatly to acquire.All I require from you is your honest cooperation to enable us see this transaction through.I guarantee that this attract no risk at all for it will be executed under legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law.

Like we say in India, "Neki aur poochh poochh?". There you are waiting for my response and here I am, raring to come to Togo. I have already booked a discounted Air India ticket to Dammam. Because I couldn't get a direct flight to Lome. I guess I will have to hitch a ride from there. Can you please tell me the preferred mode of transport? We don't have that kind of information in India. I am sure Mr. Badran would have been so ashamed of my ignorance if he were alive today.
Regarding your share, I am ready to shell out a huge sum for your cooperation (you have already made all the legal documents for me, after all). So in return for your huge favour, I will part with a magnanimous sum of $2 and 39 cents. I am so happy with you that I will also remit to you the charges for the documents that you "payed greatly to acquire" or 47 cents, whichever is lower. What's more, I will even give you a discount for your payment of my air tickets.
Regarding your concern about the law, don't worry Mr. Samad. We are all corrupt here. Even if you can't get me out of the trouble, I'll ensure that with my newfound riches, I will get myself out.

On the receipt of your response via the above email address ,I will furnish you with a detailed clarification .

Sincerely,



Abdul Samad.


So that's how my life changed and I went on the path to riches!! As a gesture of sharing my happiness with all of you, I have decided to give all of my friends a grand treat, in the finest hotel in Lome, Togo. So be there, I will truely appreciate it.




P.S.
1>The credit for the idea for this entry goes to a blog I read today.
2>I did mark the mail as spam. I hope none of the receivers falls for it.

Respite

It was a little after 7 pm. I was going back home. I had to change trains as usual. I was lucky enough to get a (relatively) less crowded train for the first leg; so it couldn't have been stress. It is Mumbai; so it couldn't have been the weather either. My flu has also been cured, so it wasn't the fever. Yet, while waiting for my connecting train, on that crowded platform, in the absence of any wind, I shivered.

I was one with my sub-conscious a moment before that. My mind was doing what it's best at; when it is left to wander by itself. It was revelling in my near-past experiences. It reached an intense incidence that happened less than two weeks ago. The incidence that had left my ego hurt and years of trust broken. It triggered a chain reaction that was over in a few, but vehement seconds. A pain, that subsided in a matter of seconds, probably because it had been experienced before, more than once. A surge of confused anger towards the one who caused it, which again died, because something inside me said that it wasn't anybody's fault. It probably wasn't. An overwhelming sense of awareness, of losing my equanimity. A strong guilt, for losing my peaceful balance, which was why I shivered...... Finally, peaceful empathy.

It was in this state of peace that I was sub consciously searching for a familiar face, to share my compassion. In that sea of bodies. Somebody who could understand me. Somebody who was not closed inside his or her mind. Who could take a little time out of his or her busy schedule. Somebody who could converse with me. Not necessarily talk or listen, but somebody who could just share..... Somebody.... Anybody.....
Then I saw her.

The purest being in that place. The living example of selfless love. Innocent. Candid. Shy.
I had met her before, once, at that very place. I hoped that she would recognise me. She did. She acknowledged my presence and responded to me reaching out to her. She greeted me. The affection was definitely growing. Then I did something that I normally don't do to others. I ruffled her shiny hair. I went ahead and stroked her fair cheek and neck. I was hoping that she won't mind that, after all, she was too young to be self conscious of such public displays of affection. Her body language said that she liked it. That in this lonely world full of stress, she found that simple touch soothing. Her eyes closed in a kind of acceptance.

Her actions were the only means by which I could gather her thoughts, for she didn't speak my language. In fact, she couldn't speak at all. She was born with this impairment. Her kins here have the same "disability". But time and again she and her kins have taught me that words are not required to communicate the essential. That the most meaningful of all feelings can be conveyed by a simple touch. Sometimes a nudge. That is what she and her kins have used with me as a communication tool all these years. That is what I have used to befriend her. To strengthen my bonds with as many four legged "man's best friend"s as I can.

They always end up giving more affection than getting. Today was no different. Today a street dog feeding off leftovers at a platform of Kurla station gave me pure, expectationless love. Much more of it than what the sea of people could give me, even if I were a celebrity.

They experience many complex emotions that the "superior" humans do. They have their own way of expressing them. Whether it is a twist in the neck combined with raised eyebrows showing surprise at the comfort that we humans show at the presence of a new guest; or it is the grabbing of a human's arm with their teeth, lightly, and putting it across their belly, to announce their acceptance of friendship; it is all there.